So, you’re going to meet someone new? Nervous? Excited? Stressed? All of the above and then some? Meeting new people is one of my very favorite aspects of the lifestyle. Throughout all the various incarnations of my personal lifestyle journey I have always loved meeting and getting to know new people. Sure you can meet people other ways, I love that too. But there is just something about sitting down with another couple, or single or whoever and getting to know them on such an interesting level so quickly.
What makes for a good first meeting?:
-One of the simple things you can do is prepare. You may or may not look at swinging as “dating”, but either way you should prepare as if you were going on a date. Being clean, done up and presentable is something that is nearly universally appreciated. Shower, landscape, and do whatever else you think may be appropriate. Bringing protection and anything else you may need for the evening is always a good idea. Playing with your new friends may or may not be on the table, but it’s always good to over-prepare.
-Something I have learned that helps immensely is to have no expectations. There’s nothing wrong with having hopes or being excited, but I would highly recommend going into any new interactions with a very open mind and low to no expectations. Nights can pan out in so many different ways. Sometimes people flake. Sometimes they just aren’t what you hoped. If you go into an evening with no expectations, a nice evening chatting with interesting people that does not end in sex could be fantastic. If you have expectations of sex, and evening chatting with interesting people could be a huge let down. Trust me, the sex will happen. If at first you don’t succeed… well you know. Keep expectaions low in order to improve your overall adventure.
-Another recommendation would be to limit your intake of alcohol or any other mind, mood or energy altering drug. (As a side note illegal drugs are very often frowned upon in the swinger community. I’m not your mom, just use good judgement.) You may want to loosen up a bit, which I understand, but don’t over do it. You want to be yourself. You don’t want to be overly silly, aggressive or drunk. I’m sure you would like to remember your evening and you definitely want to make sure you’re being safe. Also if you have to be drunk to swing, maybe you’re not really in a place right now that this is for you.
-Last but not least: Be in a good place. If you and your significant other just had a spat, it might be best to think about rescheduling the meeting. If that isn’t ideal at least spend some time re-centering yourself and making sure you are both looking forward to the encounter.
Remember, it’s all about fun and enhancing your life.
Do a little research, a little introspection and a little preparation and then…
have the best time you can imagine!!!
Learn from your experiences.
Rinse and REPEAT!!!